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Timor Mortis Conturbat Me

Title: Timor Mortis Conturbat Me

Author Eglantine_br

Rating PG (For epidemic death)

Character Thomas Kyd

Trying something new here guys-- not fan-fic exactly. Is this RPF? Maybe. He was real, but I am making his thoughts up. And I am also playing with facts a little. His parents survived him, poor man, he died young. He did live thorough the plague in London though. I hope to eventually bring Marlowe into the story. Lots of angst, heroics, m/m, hurt-comfort, good stuff here... Wish me luck.

Timor Mortis Conturbat Me

I waited, as a son should, but I had not saved them, and I could not watch them into the cart.

The carter was thick bodied, he moved with a limp, but brisk. The cloth covered his mouth, but his eyes touched me. I felt the weight of them, a player learns the feel of eyes upon him.

He had a boy with him, an apprentice to his ghastly trade? Maybe. Or maybe a son to be his help and comfort of his old age, as a son should do-- as I could not do. He spoke to the boy kind and soft, I know that.

The man opened the door with his crowbar. Quick motions, and a protest of nails. I stood in the light of the dooryard, and looked into the gloom of the house. Then I could not look. But I heard the soft sound of them coming to rest upon the others in the cart. He tried to lay them modest, I am sure. After some time the stiffness passes, and the dead can be made seemly. He had tried to do this, I saw. But I could not watch him with my parents. The cart was half full already, he set them upon their neighbors, not upon rough wood. All would go together. I gave the man a coin, also the boy.

The man nodded silent, but the boy smiled sunshine up into my face. A child, he knew no better. Maybe he thought to buy an apple tart. I would have done so, at his age.

And now no one would know that my father had bit his nails, or that my mother had been quick to laugh and did wonders with bread and sausages.

I sat down on the step, put my head down on my knees for some time. The day was coming on warm.


( 16 comments — Leave a comment )
Sep. 5th, 2012 10:19 pm (UTC)
Historical fiction, it's called when it's on the shelves, usually.

I like it.
Sep. 5th, 2012 10:34 pm (UTC)
Palm sweating fear, at my house, at trying something new. Glad you like it.
Sep. 5th, 2012 10:44 pm (UTC)
not fan-fic exactly. Is this RPF? Maybe.
It's your writing, and that's all that matters. And it's as vivid and clear as I would expect from you. It never astonishes me how you can bring a scene right before the reader's eyes with so few words. That's a rare talent. This is terribly sad but there are real flashes of brightness here too. I'll certainly look froward to reading more :)
Sep. 5th, 2012 11:14 pm (UTC)
Been reading about these men and their times. It is sort of like a car wreck you cannot turn away from. The commonplace nature of death, is pretty horrifying to me, but the utter lack of civil rights is more of a shock.

They had laws, but none of the 'freedoms' that I take for total granted. They had secret evidence, no right to face accusers, no- knock-warrents, no freedom of association, no freedom to assemble, no freedom of speech, no free press, (to the point where you had to present things for examination before they could be published,) And of course, topping it all off, your religion could obviously get you nastily killed.

And yet, they made art. Marlowe got killed, Kyd got tortured
half to death, (he died the following year)

Shakespeare kept his head down better.

But they were such total badass boys... How can I not love them?

Sorry to go on and on. This is just to say, I think I will be writing more about them. I wonder what they called plot-bunnies?

Edited at 2012-09-05 11:16 pm (UTC)
Sep. 6th, 2012 08:44 pm (UTC)
My knowledge of history between 1066 and 1750 is woeful so I know very little of this period, and what I do know is very patchy. I've read snippets about Marlowe over the years though and I'd love to know more about him, so I'll really look forward to reading if you write more. Because, as you rightly say, they were total badass boys!
Sep. 5th, 2012 11:47 pm (UTC)
You have a gift there. I could see it in my mind. Thanks.
Sep. 6th, 2012 12:36 am (UTC)
Thank you, so so much. The seeing (or not) is really the thing, isn't it? I think seeing them is my favorite too. Of course seeing and writing go together-- but I never am quite sure how much ends up on the page!
Sep. 6th, 2012 09:54 am (UTC)
Beautiful. You have colour, light, taste. I can't imagine you could write anything not 'round' :) Go on. We want to know what happens next!
Sep. 6th, 2012 04:50 pm (UTC)
I am going to get to work. I have two stories on the stove right now. Today I am going to work, really.
Sep. 6th, 2012 12:07 pm (UTC)
RPF my foot - original fic yes!

this reminded me of books by Peter Ackroyd - the same understanding of atmosphere and the period. and f my poor befuzzled brain would come into focus I'd remember which book I had in mind!
Sep. 6th, 2012 04:49 pm (UTC)
Oh my, high praise there... I have not read very much of his work, but I do like it.
Sep. 7th, 2012 07:23 am (UTC)
Sep. 8th, 2012 09:02 pm (UTC)
only had a chance to have a brief read so far and hoping to have a proper read later but I am feeling like Anteros - whatever name one gives to it the clarity and economy of your lovely prose
more soon
Sep. 27th, 2016 11:54 am (UTC)
I'm reading it this time. I've decided I have room to care about these boys too. It is marvelous, as everything you write always is. Seriously, you know I have read every single thing you've posted so far, and it is all just so good.

It's nice, actually, to be reading something "classic," not something that I missed when it was on air a decade or two ago. It feels a bit familiar too because in the last year or two I read quite a lot of the Tudor and Plantagenet novels - who wrote them? The White Queen, The Red Queen, the other Bolyn Girl, etc? I could go upstairs to check, but I'd rather stay sprawled on the sofa and read Eglantine. I know some of them were made into a TV series, but of course I missed that too. We don't even have our TV hooked up. If it was hooked up it would be playing Cantonese soap operas instead of the BBC, so what would be the point? I've only recently had a good enough wifi connection and VPN to watch YouTube.
Sep. 27th, 2016 01:27 pm (UTC)
I am so glad you are reading these. I will be so curious to know what you think. I have tried to stick close as I can to the known facts.
Oct. 1st, 2016 01:09 am (UTC)
Well, yesterday I spent all my free time Yahooing Thomas Kyd and Kit Marlowe and blank verse, as one does. I can see how you find them fascinating - the shared room and the duels and brawls and spying and torture and BETRAYAL and murder. Tragedy up ahead! If Archie had been found with questionable papers in his room, he would never have blamed them on Horatio, even under torture - well, unless perhaps he had just been through the years of prison and the oubliette. The Archie at the beginning of D&D might have blamed Horatio, although yours would not have unless he was also hallucinating. He WOULD have told Horatio to say they were his, though, if he thought he was going to die anyway, and if he thought it would get Horatio off the hook. So I am already sad going into this now.

It is a little harder for me to slash men with beards, though. It helps a little to look at pictures of actors portraying your boys, instead of paintings of the men themselves. Although the actors resemble the portraits, they are considerably more attractive in my eyes! But portraiture in those days seemed to follow a different aesthetic, didn't it? Renowned beauties like Anne Boleyn and Mary Queen of Scots look positively drab in portraits.

Maybe it's just the difference between a real person and the flat portrayal on canvas. I was talking to a young mom last Sunday who was vivacious and attractive. She had sparking eyes, a lively expression, and a lovely facial structure. Another girl was taking photos of us and our respective kids. She showed us the photos. In the camera, the pretty young woman I was talking to suddenly looked eccentric and plain, a moment's expression suddenly frozen as a grimace, her glasses dominating her face in a way they did not in real life. And I thought I myself looked quite nice that day - several people had said so - but in the camera I suddenly looked at least ten kilos heavier, a turquoise sausage. I guess this just goes to prove that we are not all Jamie Bamber, and the camera does not like all of us.

(This has nothing to do with Kyd and Marlowe, but it is weighing on my mind because two days later I had some professional photos taken at a modeling agent's, looking to supplement my income with more tv commercials. I think I look all right in movement, but somehow those "Look at me, hire me, I'm pretty," still photos just look awful to me. Remembering the turquoise sausage, I wore safe black instead, but I still looked so much shorter and wider than I think I do in real life. Which is real? My reflection or my photo? It helped to think that the same thing had happened to the pretty young mom on Sunday, but I want more jobs, so the camera had better start liking me fast! Must experiment with different clothes and angles of approach.)

Edited at 2016-10-01 01:19 am (UTC)
( 16 comments — Leave a comment )